Ignorance is Bliss

The Reality of American Football

Okay so I’ll admit it. Even after living in the States for 11 years, I still don’t understand American Football. It’s not that I can’t appreciate it’s appeal. In fact, I went to a Washington Redskins game once and got to sit in an executive skybox, which I thoroughly enjoyed. Of course, being up that high you needed breathing apparatus to survive and the Hubble telescope to see what was going on down on the field but what struck me about the game is how fragmented it is. The plays (see, I know some technical terms) lurched from one down (okay don't over do it) to the next like an adolescent learning to drive a stick shift. The ironic point of the day was, I seemed to be the only one interested in the game. My fellow skybox-dwellers, all Americans, were more interested in filling up on the free beer and hot dogs. Don't get me wrong.  It was a great spectacle and a great day out but the game was too slow with too many interruptions. What with plays lasting a few seconds and TV time outs. Can you believe that? They stop for commercial breaks.

Okay.  So you've figured out that I don't understand American Football. Having grown up on a diet of real football where the players actually use their feet (imagine that?), I prefer a game that flows and is played for the amount of time it should be played (90 minutes, in two halves).

Americans are being duped into thinking that when they watch football on television, they're actually watching football.  Not so.  According to a recent Wall Street Journal article, what viewers actually get is 11 minutes. Yup! That's not a typo. In a three hour broadcast all you get to see is 10 minutes 43 seconds of play.

The Wall Street Journal analyzed four National Football League (NFL) games and the results are quite surprising.  A staggeringly low 9.4% of the the broadcast is playing time--almost 60 percent more time is devoted to replays than actual coverage. For those who love to watch football for the scantily clad cheerleaders, I am sorry to disappoint. In a three hour broadcast you are only going to see those lovely legs for about seven seconds, if you watch CBS.  Fox and ESPN showed no cheerleaders at all.

What do these highly paid football stars do for their money? Basically, stand around.

Do I care?  Not really.  I enjoy it for the whole spectacle and the true American experience. So grab me a beer and a hot dog because the game's about to start. Ignorance is bliss.